It is possible to divorce without going to court. Litigation is typically the most costly and time-consuming way to resolve separation issues, and most couples manage to finalize their divorce without it. If that is your goal, you’re in the right place. Below is our Step-by-Step Guide to divorcing amicably.
An amicable divorce is based on mutual agreement. You and your spouse negotiate the terms of your separation and formalize them in a Separation Agreement. Once the agreement is finalized, a family lawyer prepares and submits the required court documents for a judge’s review. The judge then determines whether to grant the divorce.
Step 1: Get Clear on Your Goals and Priorities
Take time to reflect on what matters most to you. What are your priorities when it comes to your children, your home, and your finances? Knowing what’s important will help you negotiate confidently, fairly, and focus on solutions that meet your needs.
List your top three priorities. This can be stability for the children, keeping the matrimonial home, financial security, and so on. On the flip side, note areas where you’re willing to compromise. Finally, keep communication with your spouse respectful and focused on practical issues.
Step 2: Understand Your Legal Rights in Ontario
Understanding your legal rights helps you recognize what’s fair and can prevent costly mistakes. Key areas to understand include property division, child custody and support, and spousal support. An Ontario Family Lawyer is crucial to understanding your rights and obligations in separation, including how equalization works under Ontario’s Family Law Act and how the federal child and spousal support guidelines apply,
Book an appointment with an Ontario Family Lawyer to get legal advice tailored to your situation.
Step 3: Gather Your Financial Information
Full financial disclosure is required for any valid separation agreement. This includes income, assets, debts, and expenses for both spouses.
An Ontario Family Lawyer will have you gather your last three years of tax returns and Notices of Assessment, recent pay stubs, mortgage statements, bank account balances, and investment statements. Make a list of debts, including credit cards and loans. Being transparent at this stage is important; incomplete disclosure can delay or invalidate your separation agreement.
Step 4: Choose the Right Out-of-Court Process
There are several ways to resolve issues without going to court. The right choice depends on your level of communication and cooperation.
- Negotiation: You and your lawyers communicate directly to reach an agreement.
- Mediation: A neutral mediator helps guide the discussion and find middle ground.
- Collaborative Divorce: Both spouses and their lawyers commit to resolving issues without litigation.
- Arbitration: A private arbitrator hears your case and makes a final, binding decision.
Step 5: Draft a Separation Agreement
A separation agreement records the terms you and your spouse have agreed upon. It usually covers:
- Parenting arrangements and decision-making responsibility
- Child and spousal support
- Division of property and debts
- Ownership of the family home
- Insurance, pensions, and future obligations
An Ontario Family Lawyer will prepare or review the agreement to ensure it’s complete and enforceable. They will review each clause carefully with you to ensure the agreement reflects your intentions accurately, and make sure you’ve exchanged full financial disclosure.
Step 6: Get Independent Legal Advice (ILA)
Each spouse must receive independent legal advice before signing the agreement. This ensures both parties fully understand their rights and that the agreement is fair.
What you can do:
- Schedule ILA before signing.
- Ask your Family Lawyer to explain each term in plain language.
- Sign only once you’re confident in your understanding.
Step 7: File for an Uncontested Divorce
Once the separation agreement is finalized and you’ve lived apart for at least one year, you can apply for divorce. If both parties agree on all terms, this is called an uncontested divorce, and no court appearance is required.
An Ontario family lawyer will file your Application for Divorce with the Ontario Superior Court of Justice. After filing, the court will review your materials and, if everything is in order, issue the divorce order. For a joint divorce, this process typically takes about 4 to 8 weeks, though timelines can vary depending on the court’s workload. For an uncontested/simple divorce, expect it to take about 4 to 6 months.
Step 8: Finalize and Move Forward
Once your divorce is granted, it’s important to update your legal and financial documents. This includes revising your will, updating beneficiaries, reviewing insurance policies, and closing or transferring any joint accounts. Keep copies of your divorce order and separation agreement in a secure place. Finally, take time to focus on your next chapter: rebuilding your routines, clarifying co-parenting arrangements, and strengthening your financial stability.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
During a separation or divorce, certain missteps can complicate the process or lead to long-term consequences. One of the most serious is signing an agreement without obtaining legal advice, which can limit your rights or create obligations you didn’t anticipate. It’s also essential to provide full and honest financial disclosure; withholding information can delay your case and undermine the validity of your agreement. Many people also rush decisions about parenting or finances, ignore the tax implications of dividing assets, or allow emotions to overshadow long-term goals. Avoiding these mistakes can make the process far smoother and more stable for everyone involved.
How a Family Lawyer Can Help
Even in an amicable divorce, the right legal guidance makes a big difference. A family lawyer can explain your rights and options, help you negotiate fair and practical terms, and draft or review your separation agreement to ensure it reflects your intentions. They will also prepare and file your divorce paperwork and confirm your agreement is enforceable and compliant with Ontario Family Law.
If your goal is to stay out of court while protecting your rights, working with an Ontario Family Lawyer provides clarity, structure, and peace of mind.